The Dark Side of Fate Novel Chapter 61 – Remorse ~Leo~
I did not know the meaning of misery until I found myself living in it. Since I learned that Tamia was getting married to Sylvester, my heart has broken into a million pieces.
I was hoping she would come back one day. Most of the northern captives always do. I wanted to right all my wrongs and seek her forgiveness.
I sat on the couch in my living room. I stared at the invitation to the all-region
sports games sent to me by the council, and even though we had responded, I was dreading going there. I was going to see
Tamia in his arms, and my heart could
not bear it.
Amanda came out of her room, and that
was when I noticed she had packed her
bags.
“Where are you going to? You are almost
due.” I asked her, and she bowed her
head.
“This isn’t the life I wanted for myself,
Leo. I can’t continue living in another
woman’s shadow. She has moved on, yet
you choose to be miserable. I have
pleaded with you several times. You have disgraced me and belittled me. Most of the Lunas mock me now. I do not have a
title, and neither are we married. Why did you do this to me, Leo?” She said, and I
did not know how to start.
“I can’t forgive myself for what we did to Tamia. She did not deserve all that
happened to her here.” I said, confessing my truth, and she sobbed. (1
“Why?” she asked, and I looked at her.
“I broke every promise I made to her
because of you,” I said, with my heart
wrenching.
“She would have done the same had she
found her fated,” Amanda said, and I
shook my head.
“She was stronger than me in that
regard, Amanda. I know Tamia, and she would die before breaking her promise. She would have risked being weak to stay
happy with me.” I said and bowed my
head.
“I was her first. She did not want to get
with me because we weren’t fated, but I assured her she had nothing to worry
about,” I said, and after saying it, I saw
myself as a deceiver.
“She did not want me,
But I
assured her. I told her I would reject my fated and risk being weak. She trained to be strong because of me, and we used to joke about balancing each other’s strength.” I said, and Amanda came to sit next to me while I wept.
“I promised her many things and broke everything that day on the balcony when I did not reject you. You came to my home quite alright, but you did not force me to get into your bed. You did not force me to accept the bond or claim you and did not force me to make her share. I lost my way completely and found myself doing things I couldn’t even imagine to her. Never spending time with her, refusing to go out with her. I did so many things to her, Amanda; I treated her like a burden. And do you know the twisted part of all of
this was that I expected her to bear with me and understand? I was a selfish prick,
I said, laughing at myself.
“I hurt her and broke all my promises. I
was her first, and I broke everything. I can never forgive myself for what I did to my wife, Amanda. She wanted to have
children, and I told her we should wait; I
could only understand her pain when she found out you were pregnant. I knew she
would be hurt if I did not take the same
precautions with you. It was as if I had used her to while away time until my
fated came. I had failed completely, so I
can’t move on, Amanda.” I said and
looked at her.
“I do not hate or dislike you. If anything,
you have been with me through this difficult time, but I can’t forgive myself
for what I did to Tamia. I saw the pain in
her eyes before those men attacked, and I
can never shake off the fact that I caused
That pain was a permanent fixture
since the dinner party when I met you. I
failed her every single time until there was nothing left to salvage,” I said and
began to weep.
I had to let out my hurt because, other
than being my wife, Tamia was my best friend and confidant. I thought Casper
was my best friend, but I was wrong.
Tamia was there all along, and I took her for granted. She was always there to lift me up; she had my back and looked out for me. She made me happy and went out of her way to put a smile on my face.
had never felt so alone in my life. Although I was surrounded by people, I was lonely and sad.
Amanda wrapped her arms around me and let me cry. The irony was that she
was the cause of my pain and was trying
to comfort me.
“You have to forgive yourself, Leo. Tamia
has moved on, and she has found love.” She said with a definite tone, meaning she knew something I didn’t.
I broke the hug, wiped away my tears, and looked into her eyes.
“How do you know this?” I asked her, and
she smiled.
“You forget I schooled in the north. Everyone is talking about the soon-to-be lady of the north. The Wolf Lord is madly in love with her. She presides over council matters. She can do whatever she likes.
Recently she went to the west
unaccompanied to discuss peace with Alpha Jake. She has moved on Leo, and she is happy. Why can’t we do the same?” She said. I was hurt to hear that Tamia was free to move around, and she did not bother to come and see me so we could
talk things through.
“She has let you go, Leo; you should do the same,” Amanda said, and I shook my
head.
“If you think I am lying to you, you will see them at the all-region games; I am sure you will have closure then,” she said and stood up.
“As for me, I am going back home. I hoped you would come around, but until you get the closure you want, I know you won’t come around,” She said, and I stopped her from leaving.
“You will be due soon,” I said and placed
my hand on her bump.
“I do not want to miss out on this. I want
to be there. I want to hold your hand through it, Amanda,” I said, and she shook her head, wiping away her tears.
“You do not get to pick and choose, Leo.
You are either all in or not,” she said, and
I understood what she was saying and
nodded.
“Please stay and give me time. I will try to
make it right.” I pleaded with her, and she looked around and wiped away her
tears.
“You compare me to her all the time, Leo. You always talk about her; you call her name in your sleep, even when we make
love. How much more do you want me to endure? I never wanted this for myself. I have done everything to fit into her shoes. I have been training since they
took her. I have studied hard and am a
work in progress, but you are not encouraging me or giving me the support I need. You are not helping me, Leo. I am going through the transition alone. I can’t continue like this.” She said, and I buried my face in her neck close to my
mark and sucked gently, making her
moan. 3
I knew I was playing dirty, but I was
desperate.
“Please give me time, Amanda. I am begging you.” I pleaded with her, and she
refused weakly with a moan.
“Please,” I said and kissed her neck.
Black growled, wanting her and I let him
slowly take over.
“Please..” I said and kissed her.
She let down her defences, and Black took
over. She was our mate, and we were
trying to make her stay.
I woke up to someone banging on my
front door.
Amanda was sleeping peacefully. I looked at the clock, and it was twelve midnight.
I wondered who would be knocking on
my door late in the night.
Amanda woke up, and I asked her to go
back to sleep. She had bought a bigger bed
for her room so she could roll
comfortably on the bed.
I was yet to move her to the room I shared with Tamia, and I doubt I could do that. Buying a new house was looking like the way forward, but I would wait until after
the games.
I wasn’t hoping to get Tamia back this time; I just wanted to be sure she was
genuinely happy.
If I suspected she was being forced by the wolf lord, I planned to help Devin take
her from him. She deserved to be happy,
even if it wasn’t with me.
I wore my shorts and advanced toward
the main door.
I was shocked to see it was Kyle. He was
drunk and naked.
I let him into my house.
His eyes were swollen and red, and I wondered why he would run in wolf form
from his territory to mine.
Was he out of his mind? I went to get him joggers, and he wore them and sat on my
couch.
“What is the matter with you? It is twelve midnight. How long did it take you to get here?” I asked him, and he sighed.
“Thirty minutes, I went through the woods,” He said, and I knew that was the only explanation for how he could get
here in wolf form, still drunk.
It seemed Kyle had taken over from Linda
and become the new drunk of our
territory.
“What is the matter with you?” I asked
him, and he began to weep.
“I shouldn’t have let my Linda go, Leo. I
was a horrible man. I did unspeakable things to her, and now I am paying dearly for it,” he said, and I wondered what he was talking about.
“Rebecca is a bitch,” he said with scorn.
“Her triplets aren’t mine,” he confessed,
and I was shocked.
“It seemed she was pregnant before I
claimed her,” he said, and he wept.
“That was why I accepted her because Linda and I had been trying, and there had been nothing. I called my wife useless and barren and made my officers fuck her for entertainment,” He said, and I
punched him before I could realise what I
was doing. He looked at me in shock. 4
I sent another.
“How the fuck could you do that? Do you
know how that poor woman was seen and
labelled? No wonder she was always
drunk and willing to hop into bed with anyone. You had broken her and taken
her pride from her, Kyle,” I said,
growling at him, and he bowed his head
in shame.
Most of the land, money and resources he owned belonged to Linda. Why would he hurt her like that? He deserved the pain.
he was feeling.
“I was mad at her. I saw my time with her as wasted years. In my head, I had to touch my fated once, and she got pregnant. Meanwhile, I was with Linda for six years, and she never got pregnant.. ” he explained, and I wanted to beat the
shit out of him, but he was already beating himself.
“Did you seek medical help to find out
what the matter was?” I asked, and with
how he looked at me, I knew the answer
was no. The man was an idiot.
“So, how do you know the triplets are
bastards?” I asked him.
“Kent fell ill, and the doctor wanted to
give him a blood transfusion. The mother
volunteered, but she wasn’t a match, so naturally, it should have been me, but she refused. The doctor offered to test my
blood and found that I wasn’t a match
either. So we decided to do other tests and
discovered they weren’t mine. She confessed to being with someone before me, and while I was still trying to figure out whether to accept or reject her, she continued to sleep with this man. She deliberately got pregnant, so she would
get me because she knew I wanted children,” He said and bowed his head.
“The bitch planned it all, Leo. She planned it all. She planned Linda’s exit from my life,” He said, weeping, and I
wondered what he wanted me to do now.
“What do you want?” I asked him, and he wiped away his tears, got up and went to my liquor cabinet to help himself to more
alcohol. 1
“You’re in good rapport with the Wolf lord. I want to exchange Rebecca for my Linda,” he said.
I knew it was the alcohol speaking
because there was no way he could be
serious, but I wanted to poke him a bit
before telling him the truth. 1
“What about her being barren?” I asked,
and he bowed his head in shame.
“Doctor said I have low sperm count, and
I could only get her pregnant with assistance,” he said.
I knew the idiot had already figured that
out without the doctor because the
woman was pregnant when he requested to have her locked up for flimsy reasons.
“I doubt Linda would want to come back to you, Kyle. The Wolf Lord is treating them well.” I said, and he growled.
“Is he fucking her? Because I know that is what they do in the north. Fuck other people’s wives,” he said, and I shook my
head.
“He isn’t; he is with Tamia; I think she is with another alpha. I do not know, but I am sure you will find out during the All- Region Games. If she is free, you can plead your case there,” I said, and he
shook his head.
“You are the leader of the east. You should have my side if he says no,” He said, and I shook my head.
“I will not risk war because of you. You
have to try to offer the exchange most
amicably, but I will advise you to continue your life with your fated and forget about Linda. She will not come back to you. I did
not do anything to Tamia, and she wanted to leave me by all means; you practically ruined Linda. She will not want you. Besides, she no longer bears your mark, so let it go and lick your wounds,” I said to him and told him he
could sleep in the third guest room while
I returned to Amanda’s room to sleep.
The man was a selfish prick.
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